"I can do hard things"

I cannot believe how many difficult things this mantra has gotten me through. 

This phrase started to jump around in my head sometime around when I was 16 or 17 years old. I was going through a very difficult time in my life and brought several challenges unto myself. I really didn't know any better. I had lost direction and didn't have many on my side. Not that anyone was against me, I just blended into the scenery. I can't say I was ever depressed because I wasn't. I was just unsure of how to exist. So many times I was faced with difficult choices. There was one or two people I could have confided my problems to but I've always wanted to be the type of girl who dealt with her problems on her own; independently. One day I heard/saw/read (I can't remember) "I can do hard things". It resonated with me so strongly. I can remember several instances of me just bawling my eyes out, one thing always came to mind. "I can do hard things". I would whisper it to myself until I could physically get up and dry my tears and continue on with whatever needed to be done. This is something that has been useful to me in adulthood as well. Now days I find myself saying it when I'm frustrated or feel like I have what seems like an unobtainable goal or task at hand. During the birth of my second child, I learned just how moving positive affirmations can be. I repeated many variations of "This is great". Over and over again. I had the hospital staff say it and I had Cameron say it. It helped me to achieve my medication free birth I had wanted so much. 

Having a positive attitude can change your life. 

When I pray, I ask God to lessen my burden of emotions. I often pray for this for other people as well. When I see Cameron sad or disappointed, I ask God to help him get through the sadness or the disappointment. When I feel angry I ask God to show me a constructive way to channel my anger. When I'm stressed I ask for him to lesson my stress. Rarely do I pray for specific things to happen anymore. I thank him for my family. I ask for his help in keeping my family and myself safe. I count my blessings (because I have many, even if my life isn't exactly how I'd imagined it), I pray for strength to deal with situations myself. I tell myself, "I can do hard things." I feel like that has helped me give myself to God more than I was before. 

Kaizie Sage - 3 years 3 months

My beautiful girl!! She is getting smarter everyday. She is developing into such a wonderful little person, I'm amazed daily. She can also be very sassy or dramatic. Sometimes she won't listen and I yell at her. I hope her first memory isn't of me yelling... I need to work on that. 

Today we went over to her friend Harley's house and they played dress up almost the entire time. I love how much of a girly girl Kaizie is. She looked so beautiful in the dress up dresses and high heels. She chose a princess outfit from a Disney movie, a girl named Aurora? I have watched very few of the Disney movies so I don't know which movie that is from. It was so fun to see her interact with another girl her age. I feel like she should get out more. 

Lately Kaizie has been a really great helper. She is becoming more responsible and independent everyday. She helps me clean up the house and is always willing to help with her sister. We have started walking quite a bit more and she has been holding Bentley's leash every single night without any help. She just looks so grown up to be walking the dog all by herself. Of course I'm right next to her pushing Adalind in the stroller, but it just seems like she has advanced so much lately. I'm so proud of her, it's crazy. She also likes to help me with dinner, she can get her own refill of water in her sippy cup, she likes to feed and water the dog, and sometime she will go get him when he's done going potty. We are working on getting her potty trained at naptime. She goes potty in the potty during the day but she still wears a pull-up as well at night. Not sure how we are going to move past that one. 

She is also recently stopped drinking milk in the last month or so. I don't know why but she has decided that she only likes on her cereal now or if it is chocolate milk. I find this funny, because I am the same exact way. It's so good to see similarities of yourself in your daughters. Today I was thinking about how sad I will be when this time passes because she's just growing up so fast. In less than a year she will be four years old and, I feel like the last three years have just flown by. I wish I had more time to go do things with her one-on-one. I have realize that a lot lately. I plan on getting a babysitter and taking her to do some things just her and I. I think that she really needs One on one time with her parents and I miss being able to chat with her or just hang out with her and give her my undivided attention without having to mind the baby too. 

 Kaizie is incredibly empathetic and she makes everyone she meets smile. She is my whole heart, and I love her so much. 

Adalind - 15 months

I feel like I write about this baby a lot. She's just changing so much and so fast that I can't help but be a little crazy about it. So lately she has been over lovable and it's just I love it. Unfortunately Cam is been out of town working California so he hasn't gotten a chance to really experience it. I miss him a lot. I think the kids do too. Adalind has started to like love love love nursing. I don't know why. But she's crazy about it now and sometimes it drives me a little bit crazy! Every time I sit down to go Pee and she's upstairs with me, she lifts her arms up and makes me pick her up and she wants me to nurse her while I'm going Pee. For some reason she thinks it's the perfect time to get in a little snack ha ha. She also is very in love with her blanket, Her B, which she calls BobBEE and her seahorse. She says a lot of words and has started saying thank you. She goes crazy when we FaceTime her dad. She just wants to hug and kiss the screen the WHOLE time. :) adorable. Her favorite food this month is pasta salad, corn on the cob, and watermelon. A summer baby for sure. My daughter for sure :) <3